Confucius noted that “All humans are the same, except for their habits.”
Habits are your natural tendencies or practices. They determine how you behave or react to a situation and they are automatic reflexes, often unconsciously made. We are all largely the same biologically, but we differ in how we behave or react to things.
Given that habits define your uniqueness and personality, then maturing habits that enhance contentment and wellness would be constructive. I have struggled to make my intentional activities (the 40% I control, see graph below) habitual and more beneficial. Learning to be grateful, positive and reframing problems to possible thinking took a lot of mindful effort. However, with practice these responses and perspectives became my natural habits - my default reaction.
Habits do have a pattern in their formation. Repeating the same behavior consistently, deliberately and with mindful determination, for on average for 66 days, make a behavior or response automatic and habitual. The wonderful reward of building wellness and contentment habits is that you get a subtle but real reward almost immediately and sub-consciously; you feel better quite quickly. But just like medicine, once you start to feel improved health you often stop taking the medicine. So also with wellness habits.
Positive psychology suggests that the most useful and easiest well-being habit to mature is gratitude. Start a gratitude journal to note your blessings, finding three to five things to be grateful for EVERY day. Express internally or externally gratitude at every available opportunity (and especially when you are in a difficult situation). Search for wonder in your present moment.
Design your wellness program and invest 66 days to see what happens. Nothing to lose- just take baby steps, one habit at a time.
Think about looking at some of your strengths and making them more habitual and regular.
What other well-being habits might you want to cultivate?
Ø seeking opportunities for service
Ø delaying gratification to its most opportune moment
Ø exercising
Ø working with your willpower to make it stronger
Ø wanting less
Ø practicing resilience
Ø looking for opportunities to express your purpose.
Reflection Source: www.Smallercup.org
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For further reading, if you are interested:
How are habits formed: Modelling Habit Formation in the Real World, Phillippa Lally, Cornelia H. M. van Jaarsveld, Henry W. W. Potts, Jane Wardle; European Journal of Social Psychology, 16 July 2009, https://doi.org/10.1002/ejsp.674.