Imagine you’ve just had an unfortunate experience and you are very discouraged by it.  You want to quit whatever because at this moment it is just too much.  Or someone did something that really aggravated you and you are fuming with anger.  You write a really angry and poisonous email to vent your frustration.  You seriously think about quitting or sending the email.

Can I make a suggestion which I wish I had followed when I was feeling like that?  DON’T QUIT ON A BAD DAY.  SEND THAT EMAIL TOMORROW, AFTER YOU’VE RE-READ IT AND HAVE COOLED DOWN.

Making serious decisions requires reflection and pause.  These are not fast thinking, spur of the moment reflexes that need an immediate response. Be very mindful that reactions can have significant lingering consequences, as they often cannot be easily reversed.  Once you QUIT or hit SEND that is it.  The dust and fallout will settle where it may, and that may not be a good resting place.

I know it is very difficult to pause at these trying moments but PAUSE you MUST!  You are emotionally charged and eager to do something, but should you?  Rarely are these trying occasions dangerous or life threatening so there is no urgency to act decisively or firmly.  This is not a LET GO moment, but a CHILL or REFRAMING opportunity.

From my experience, not quitting or hitting SEND was a God sent relief.  Things were not as bad as I imagined, it was just my imagination getting ahead of me.  And that email, it could have become a CLM (Career Limiting Move), or required some serious back tracking to get out that mess.

When the going gets weird, reframe that moment with a big STOP sign.  Have you got the facts straight?  Is your rage helpful or harmful? What will tomorrow look like if I quit or offend that other party? 

I am not suggesting that you give in or accept an unfair situation.  Rather I am clearly suggesting that before you do something extreme you carefully consider if you have a (better) Plan B option. Be careful, you might just get what you ask for!

 Reflection Source: www.Smallercup.org

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